- You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".
- You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine on the chesterfield."
- You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
- You drink Pop, not Soda.
- You know that a Mickey and 2-4's means "party at the camp, eh!!!"
- You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays (not vacation), with good cigars and no Americans.
- You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway AND furthermore, You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
- You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
- You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
- You cried when you heard that "Mr. Dress Up" died recently.
- You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada, and then angered when they forget to add the province. Example: when a talk show host announces a Canadian guest as being from "Toronto, Canada", "Calgary, Canada", Vancouver, Canada". Um, no - it's "Toronto, Ontario", "Calgary, Alberta" and "Vancouver, B.C.". Canadians don't go around saying "New York, United States of America"; "Los Angeles, United States of America"; Texas, United States of America". Sounds stupid, DOESN'T it?
- You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, the late John Candy, Martin Short, Celine Dion & many, many more great entertainers are Canadians.
- You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian and the CEO of Air Canada/Canadian (that money losing hole!!!) is actually American!!
- You know what a toque is and how to wear it.
- You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
- You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed".
- You live in a house with no front step, but the door is one meter up from the ground.
- Your local newspaper covers the national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
- You know that the four seasons means: winter, still winter, almost winter, and road work.
- You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day and -36 degrees is winter!
- You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
- You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan".
- You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night Canada".
- You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
- "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite than,"Huh?"
- You call it a BUN not a "Roll".
- It's called a WASHROOM not a lavatory or powder room or rest room.
- You're going to actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all of your Canadian friends!!!! (and then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them, further !

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